Why Not?

'Alone And Drinking Under The Moon' by Li Po

Amongst the flowers I
am alone with my pot of wine
drinking by myself; then lifting
my cup I asked the moon
to drink with me, its reflection
and mine in the wine cup, just
the three of us; then I sigh
for the moon cannot drink,
and my shadow goes emptily along
with me never saying a word;
with no other friends here, I can
but use these two for company;
in the time of happiness, I
too must be happy with all
around me; I sit and sing
and it is as if the moon
accompanies me; then if I
dance, it is my shadow that
dances along with me; while
still not drunk, I am glad
to make the moon and my shadow
into friends, but then when
I have drunk too much, we
all part; yet these are
friends I can always count on
these who have no emotion
whatsoever; I hope that one day
we three will meet again,
deep in the Milky Way.

I want to surround myself with people who have nothing better to do than be with me, no demands, leave your baggage at the door.

At nineteen, I quit college. I tossed my knee high Doc Martins, a green hoodie, and Whitman's 'Leaves of Grass' onto the pile of cassettes in the front seat and drove south.

Nothing changes in rural western Kentucky; the picket fences get a fresh coat of paint, dead dogs are replaced with replicas, pickups powder into rust next to leaning gray barns. It would be the same when I returned.

The house sat two acres off the highway. The front porch sagged. The shingles turned over like leaves before a storm. Cindi smeared blackberry juice on the front of her shirt before wrapping her plump arms around my waist. It wasn't home, but if you are going to squat for a while there's no place better than in the kitchen of an old friend.

The barbecue began the next evening. He strutted through the smoke like a warrior after victory. He didn't need game, or lines. One look in his black eyes and you knew he had never once doubted he was beautiful.

We hid behind the barn.
"How long are you staying?"
"A week, a month, never leaving, I don't know," I said, spinning before him.
He reached out for my hand. "You're beautiful."
"What does that have to do with how long I'm staying?" I mumbled into his curls.
He laughed at me. "I'll call you a toad if you'd rather I did so."
I stood there, biting my lip.
"Do you want company?"
"Tonight?" I asked.
"While you're here."
"Why not?"


I just want to be with people for no good reason.